September 15, 2010

how come you try to judge me, and expect me to judge you???



so this is to some people who are new to my blog…


my first name is nora cassandra… i was born in finland september 1978… my mum is practically an atheist and some moments i think she believes if there was a god then it’s a woman… her mother (or family) are christian lutherans. my dad has introduced himself with many religions, one was chritianity when met my mum another is science and last i knew about was a muslim sheat… my dad’s family are sheat muslims… i was also baptised in a greek orthodox church before marrying my second husband…


i was raised for my first 7 years in finalnd… churches was somewhere i visited very often with my grandmother… so yes i did grow up thinking god’s name is jesus!!!! and it was also where i was taught women have rights and so does children and animals!!! then after i was kidnapped by my dad… i was beaten up for over 6 years to pray a prayer and do things without being convinced about them… i still have bruises at my age to remind me… and my dad’s family, when i became a teenager and after years of trying to do what they want me to do just to get their love… rejected me. i was called names behind my back as the christian’s daughter… not original… and of course the worst of all (my dad’s name)’s daughter!!!! at the age of 15 i knew i was and will never be a muslim… with all my respect to my muslim family they were never able to convince me… and with all my respect to my sunnat muslim teachers, they never were able to convince me either!!!


i was into cars, motorbikes, sports, politics but not shopping nor love… i was a man who was in a woman’s, body… but i wasn’t into girls and don’t think will ever be… so i’m straight!!! it was just that kuwaiti women were not kind of women i would get along with… so i hanged out with guys… never had sex nor real boyfriend with sexual relation… max i did was kissing but even that didn’t feel much so never was in love in my teenage years… so i wasn’t a bad girl not even if you go through islamic or any religion’s (laws)… i just liked things boys liked and was accepted by them as one of them!!!


i was very angry young woman… but i still believed that i had rights to choose my life and my actions just as i remembered i had the right in finalnd… i had my first sexual relationship when i was 20… i had real intercourse… i do not regret it and still would do it again with the same guy… no i was not in love with him, but we had such a connection that it felt right!!! months after that got married to a sunni muslim (not the man i had sex with) at the age of 20, what do we really know about love… i just wanted to get out of my dad’s house and away from a family that hates me because i’m different!! but sadly it didn’t work out… as i was alone in kuwait no family except a husband that we fell out of love in few months… i had no one!!!


i went to finalnd… in finalnd at first i was trying to do what ever my mum wanted me to do or i thought she wanted me to do… that what all the hate and beating in kuwait taught me… you should act and behave in the way people want you to do so you would be loved… but soon after i realized my mum was nothing like that!!!!


i could be a jew, muslim, christian, atheist or even a satanist as long as she cared… she just wanted to see me happy… came a day where i was dating tony… my big love and heartbreak… she did not like him at all.. well he was a dealer and a looser but i still fell for him… she said to me she didn’t like him and wishes i would see that he is no good for me, but in the end of the conversation she said nora cassandra, i love you and you are an adult… i will love you if you date the devil himself as much as i will love you dating a saint… nothing will change my love to you!!!


another thing she always reminded me with is that i’m a woman… i need men for one thing only in my life as a young lady… i need them for sex only… i do not need one to take care of me… i do not need a man to have kids as i have my daughter… i do not need them to make me feel safe as i can do all that myself… so when i meet a man i like a lot, feel comfortable to spend my time with, share my empty space with, sleep next to regularly, enjoy sex every time, and he is not trying to take over my life, that is a man i will keep dating for as long as this good feelings last!!!


i do not believe a woman should be virgin when she marries… i do not believe a woman should get engaged and suddenly move into a man’s house and live with for ever… i believe in sharing lives with people you think you can and try to live with for years before marrying or taking such steps… i’m a difficult woman to handle… very stubborn and such a pain… can’t relax sleeping next to someone in same bed easily… been married 2 times… been raised up and lived through different religions, culture and countries… i walk with finnish passport and a finnish name… so my kuwaiti part of family won’t be insulted with my view for life… i am NOT a muslim… i am NOT a christian… i am just a simple human who believes in her own believes and respect each one of you for yours… so if you are a woman who says you are 1/2 arab and 1/2 non arab and believe a woman should be a virgin i respect you for that… but in return you need to learn how to respect me for just being me… i do not advice any young girl from any religion or country to have sex or don’t have… as i said i believe in freedom of choice!!!


we are just human… how come you try to judge me, and expect me to judge you??? respect and love is all what there is that will keep peace in this world and can save it… war, hate, anger and human judgments will just bring destruction!!!!



  1. OMG i think i love you . I wish you the best .

    Comment by plastique — September 15, 2010 @ 1:07 pm |Reply

  2. i am just a simple human who believes in her own believes and respect each one of you for yours

    believed that i had rights to choose my life and my actions

    i really don’t know what to say >>> but gal ur rock
    i respect you… i wish i can have 1/10 of ur determination..

    i wish i can do half what you did

    so high five to you dear… and just keep as u are
    and you dont know… you might hear what i’d do one day… and say i inspired her
    thx soo much for sharing this

    Comment by gumasha — September 15, 2010 @ 3:45 pm |Reply

  3. plastique; thank you!!

    gumasha; thank you dear… i did not write this to tell people what to do or try to be an inspiration… i just said what i think is my right to say!!! when my daughter asked me what is the right religion few years back… i told her i’m a human, and so is all people on earth with different religions… i can not tell any one in this world what is the right religion… and she will have to grow up and read books, and search for the religion or the believes she finds right for her!!! who am i to say muslims are wrong, or christians are wrong, or jews are wrong, or even atheists are wrong… we are all just human… and non of us can tell… and who am i to tell her what she should or shouldn’t believe in??? i told her all what matters is you respecting all believes and religions… respect the human race to get respect back… love the human race so you would get love in return!!! i’m glad you liked my post dear!!! 🙂

    Comment by noracassandra — September 16, 2010 @ 10:48 am |Reply

  4. Hello respectable and stubborn woman !!

    I really LIKE and LOVE that things on you which is respecting all the peoples believe even if you don’t believe in it !!

    you said to me before in a comment
    ” but seems people here still didn’t learn how respect other cultures and believes which is sad! ”

    I hope people here can learn this because this is the real problem of Middle East !!
    Here even if they are in one country, they don’t respect others believes, even if they are in one religion, they don’t respect the other believes, even if they are in one HOUSE !! .. everyone here thinks I’M THE RIGHT ONE while his mind is closed! … sure I’m not meaning everyone but most of the people here.

    sorry i went to far, but I miss this thing ” RESPECT ” and i found it in lovely image here …

    Nice to meet you Nora and not to mention that your blog in my favorite pages ^^

    ~~ Wish a happy life for you ~~

    Comment by Osama Halaoa — September 21, 2010 @ 12:07 am |Reply

  5. thank you osama!!! and i’m honored to know you like my blog and writings!!! i know i’m bit difficult to deal with and sound rude many times when we chat… but glad you still can see the good part in me!!! 😛

    and true… many (not all) people here didn’t learn how to respect other believes… it was the same thing in cyprus… so it’s not just arab or muslim countries… it’s a human nature… when moses came with something different the egyptions wanted him dead… when jesus was on earth the old jews wanted him dead… and when muhammed walked on earth also many people wanted him dead… when a black man walked in white’s man’s land people wanted to point fingers and wanted him dead because simply he was different!!!

    it’s a human nature to fear what is different… an human get uncomfortable and become unsure how to react with this different person… so they would something as call him/her names… as in finalnd i was called a nigger simply because i was darker than most of them… just like in kuwait i was called names because i was different!!!

    also doesn’t mean people won’t get used to it as they got used to black men on a white man’s land… as they got used to darker skins in finalnd… as people got used to airplanes, trains and cars…. but it takes time!!!

    Comment by noracassandra — September 22, 2010 @ 1:02 pm |Reply

  6. This was a very powerfull text, you are a good writer. It was also touching to read all of this.. But you seem to be a strong person even though you have experienced a lot of things in your life!

    Comment by Henriette — October 28, 2010 @ 8:24 pm |Reply

  7. Henriette; thank you so much for your comment!! i’m not strong. i just try to keep my mind open for different people and different ways of thinking!!! understanding helps not to get upset… i think we should at least try!!!

    Comment by noracassandra — November 2, 2010 @ 9:48 am |Reply

  8. Hi NoraCassandra, I met you at the BIC over the weekend and took some pictures of you and your daughter. I am glad you liked them. How can I send you digital copies?
    I have to say your Blog is awesome!! There is so much to read and absorb and my lunch break is over but I will be back for more this evening 🙂 plus I have signed up for updates!
    Take care always and keep on being you.
    best wishes

    Comment by Chrisximages — November 23, 2010 @ 9:49 am |Reply

  9. wow man!!! chrisximages!!! well were do i start from??? i loved going through your site today… i mean i found so many pics of friends… and not just from the BIC!!! i even found some of my kuwaiti friends!!! in the biker week in bahrain!!! i sent your site to i think at least 10 people today! 😛 i loved the pic where me, my daughter and her friend were in!!! i will send you my email address… and thank you about the comment you left talking about my blog!!! i just love writing!!! 😀

    Comment by noracassandra — November 23, 2010 @ 9:49 pm |Reply

  10. I just found you and you truly rock. Reading about your background really pulled at my heartstrings. You have been through so much! I wish you all the best and happiness in life!

    Comment by Alia — July 23, 2011 @ 2:37 pm |Reply

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