Thinking how my life has changed through out the last 28years and 11months and 9days!
My birthday is coming on 21st of September! I’ll be 29! I don’t feel anything special, I mean I don’t feel bad for growing up and I don’t feel any good either! Just ok! I am half Finnish for the people who don’t know and half Kuwaiti! Strange mixture but there are few of us! 😛 I was born in Finland so I carry a Finnish passport! I could have the Kuwaiti one too but why the headache!? I lived in both country quit a time just to realize I don’t belong to either! I’m rebellion hardheaded and outlawed as Kuwaitis saw me! I’m too positive, taking like easy and happy as Finnish people saw me! I was outcaste from both of my countries!
I came to Cyprus with Emmi (my best friend) about 4 years ago! I met Stelios (TO STELIOS WITH LOVE!!) I moved here to find it so difficult to start once again from 0!!
4 years has passed! I just realized in my last session with my therapist when she asked me what would I feel if I was told my father just died? My answer was first and strange when I thought about it later on! I said; I’m not 100% sure, but I don’t think I would care so much! I WON’T CARE SO MUCH???? That was a break through! I’m getting to the point of letting my anger go! If you have asked me that question 1 year ago the answer would have been; I’ll be so pissed off because I know he won’t suffer anymore in this life! But that wasn’t the answer this time! 🙂
Last Christmas my mother told me she will never forgive my father, but she wishes that I would! She explained; If I get to forgive and let go of my anger and hate to my father that would be a great gift to myself! I won’t have live in past if I let him go! I won’t have to ask myself over and over again (why)!!! I hope I reach that peak that I’m trying to climb to! I know I will, but it’ll take few more years! 😀