I think I heard one too many of wife jokes! Here are few I could remember! They still make me laugh even if I am a woman and wife! 
Ø My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Ø A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Ø I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.
Ø A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.
Ø Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
Ø A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
Ø Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of
Africa a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.
Ø Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late.
Ø A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine."
Ø A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine."
Ø Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
Ø It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
Ø A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Ø The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.
